The two partakers of the magic mushroom leapt out of a transport pipe located from a cloud about fifty feet up and in a cloud. Link stumbled a bit once he hit the ground, while Mario landed perfectly. He grinned, till Link looked at him and he stopped. They looked out at the long stretch of game limbo road ahead of them and sighed.
“Damn man when the hell did they start charging for those fscking pipes?” Link asked Mario, who just shrugged. “Well shiz, we either need to get some coinage real quick, or catch a ride with someone…” Link commented to himself as Mario pointed towards across the road, at a young-looking yellow fox holding up his right hand with a thumb pointed out. His left hand was holding up a sign read, “Will Give Head For Ride.”
“Holy shiznit Tails what in the hell are you doing?!?” Link asked the Sega mascot from across the highway.
“Hitchhiking, silly!” He quipped back with a high-pitched giggle. A shudder ran down Mario’s spine.
“Yeah, but what about the sign?” Link asked back.
“What about it?” Tails asked back, his face curious, his tails swishing behind him.
“I mean, um… do you actually, you know…” Link began before being answered anyway.
“You mean give head? Of course I do!” he replied cheerfully, then hopped a few times. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“Dude, that’s just you know, sick! And gay and stuff!”
“Gay? So what? It’s the new millennium! I’m all about being Third Party! And hey, it gets you where you’re going, right?”
“Well, I guess…” Link said as he cocked his head in thought.
“Oh yay! A ride!” Tails squealed as a blue haze began approaching them at high speeds. The main mascot of Sega stopped on a dime right by Tails, and looked him over with a grin.
“I heard you were looking for ride there good buddy.” Sonic said.
“Yeah! Yeah! Let’s get busy!” Tails said as he leapt into Sonic’s arms, who just gave his tale-tell grin and sped off.
“You know, somehow, I don’t think Tails was just looking for a ride.” Link then said with a nodding Mario in reply. Then they saw a red streak stop where Sonic a Tails were. The red echidna just grinned to himself, then muttered something about having to make a housecall then speeding off again. “Okay,” Link began, “That was just gay.” Mario nodded yet again as they saw a small light blue Volkswagen Beetle drive up and park right in front of them. A small mushroomish head popped out of the window.
“You two bums need a ride?” Toad asked as they walked up.
“Hell yes! We gotta get over to Shiggy’s so I can give him a piece of my fscking mind!” link replied with a nodding Mario in tandem.
“You two ain’t going to try and suck me off or anything are ya?” Toad then asked.
“Fsck no man! We ain’t no gay shiznits!” Link then said, with Mario nodded more vigorously. “Well, except maybe Pugdestool here.” Link added, who then received a nasty glare from the plumber. “Okay okay, naw, neither of us is gay.”
“Okay that’s good. Once that yellow brat tried pulling that off… Most foxes like that usually have nine tails. I made sure he had just two. Come-on in.” Toad waved them over. Mario was still glaring at Link.
“Sheesh man, it was just a fscking joke, clam down dude.” Link replied to the glare. Mario just frowned at that, then shrugged as they got in and headed off to Kyoto.
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